Covenant Marriage

In his talk, Covenant Marriage, Bruce C. Hafen talks about three wolves that might enter into a marriage and work to destroy it. The first one is natural adversity. Things like the death of a child or losing a job are examples of natural adversities that can enter a marriage and if we let them, they can destroy a marriage. The second wolf is one’s own imperfections. We all have imperfections and if we can support, encourage, and build one another up than we can have a strong marriage. If we belittle each other or call each other out on their imperfections then we destroy each other and will destroy our marriage. The third wolf Bruce talks about is excessive individualism. This is when a person takes to an extreme the need to be their own person. While we need to still be ourselves in our marriages, we need to come together as one to make a marriage work. We need to spend time together and share in the responsibilities of family life and all that comes with it. Bruce shares one way Satan tries to get us in this area. He says, “He exaggerates the need for having space, getting out, and being left alone.” We live in a world where everyone is talking about their “needs”. We all have needs and they need to be met, but we also need to be selfless and think about the needs of our spouse first, our lives will be happier as we do so and we will see our own needs being met, as well.

 Bruce also talks about what each companion should bring to a covenant marriage, each companion should bring 100% to the marriage to make it work. If both spouses each bring everything they have then there will be enough to make the marriage succeed. There are times in a marriage when one spouse is struggling and can’t always bring 100% and by working together, like you should in a marriage, you can still be successful and both will come out stronger and closer together, both bringing 100% again. I have experienced this in my own marriage. There are times when we are both strong and able to give 100%, but there have been times when one of us has struggled and we have had to rely on the other and we always see each other through, coming out stronger together for it. I am so grateful for that. 

I am grateful there is a place where we can create covenant marriages. This is the Washington DC Temple, which has been my favorite temple since I was twelve. I have been lucky to live near this temple the last eight years.